Well I think it's about time I get back to life as usual. I have a few posts in the works that will tell the story of the move, but today I just want to talk.
This is our 3rd big move and there are at least 2 more in the next 3 years. With each move comes a better understanding of how we work as a couple. What we can take on and what we can give up or let someone else do. Moving with children has definitely impacted the decisions we make for our little family, and as a whole, each move has been a great improvement on the last.
However, that's not what I want to talk about today. For me , moving is a frightening thing. I hate it, but at the same time, I LOVE it! Moving forces me to be BRAVE, which is something I do not come by naturally.
Today, as I loaded the girls into the car to find Sam's Club for the first time, E asked me it we were "going to Mrs. Katie's house?" I clicked her seat belt and swallowed hard. "Nope, we're not we're going to Mrs Katie's" . She was quiet for just a moment and said, "okay, well when will we go again?" "A while", I told her, it will be a while before we see them again. "Oh", she said, softly. I closed the car door and readied myself for the questions I knew were coming.
In the short time it took us to drive there she asked about every one of her Baltimore friends, even ones that were only there for a short time, and each time I told her that I wasn't sure when we'd see them again, but I knew it would be a while. Each time she responded softly, "oh".
With each child she asked about I thought of that little one's mama, and then I thought about the wonderful friends we said goodbye to just 4 short years ago when we left Memphis. and then before that when we left Knoxville. I sometimes feel like our life has been a long series of hello"s and "goodbye's, but now we aren't the only ones saying "hello" and "goodbye".
They are starting to notice and feel the changes that are happening around them and they see when I am afraid and they know when I am brave. SO, now more than ever, I want to be BRAVE. I want to make friends, even though we will only be here a year. I want to find my favorite stores, even though we will only be here a year. I will show them it is okay to CRAZY LOVE people even if you may never see them again.
I have NEVER been the most popular kid. there is an awkward and rejected 14 year old girl just under the surface and making friends, even now, at 33 years old, is one of the most terrifying things in life. So, to all the friends I have said "hello" to and then "goodbye", Thank you for loving me and allowing me to love you in return. I truly hope to see you again soon!
Till next time,